“Promise me you’ll always remember: You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” ― A.A. Milne

As with a lot of my posts here, there are few but I am slowly sailing more ships, they are a conglomeration of things I read, pictures I see and stories I hear.  This is another one of those posts.

I have written a bit on Grit.  That it is important and all students need to have, to be shown, or experience what it is like to have grit.  To grind out a problem.  To learn even though understanding doesn’t come right away.

I follow @avivaloca ‘s blog.  If you don’t yet you should, for all the wonderful thinking she thinks out loud about her practice and how it is influenced by all the people around her.  She, yesterday led me to @kkeerybi ‘s blog about letting kids be the decision makers, which was called  Risky Business.

Lastly I was traipsing through Huffington post and came across this post about Grace, the word not the person.

I like what Kristi (@kkeerybi) said about decision making in her house.

“In our house, we have made a decision to let our kids grow up having to be decision makers, problem solvers, risk takers.  We want them to persevere through trials, to learn from pain and from success.  Do they make all the decisions I would want them to make or I would advise them to make?  Not always.  But then sometimes they make better decisions than I would have advised.” -Kristi Keery Bishop

I like the formula she sets out and the way she set out the list, decision makers, problem solvers and risk takers.  It assumes in my mind at least, that if given enough time, encouragement and experience they will take hold of their own decision making.  That if done right, those decisions will be thought out.  Will they be the same as their parents? Sometimes.  Will they be worse?  Sometimes.  But sometimes they will be better.

This is where the last part comes in.  The blog about grace.  I have thought a lot about grit and how you need to get back up when you fail.  This blog talked about what you should be thinking when you fall, as you fall and get back up.  You have permission to still think you are Fabulous.  That just because you have fallen down and gotten back up does not mean you are worth less but you need to remember that you are a great person and this is only one set back, maybe of many, and that is ok.   Its another mind shift that had not thought about.  To give myself, and my students, the grace to still be fabulous.

I have seen a lot of blogs about grit and how it is an important quality to have but I have not seen a lot of blogs or tweets or instagrams about how we should go about gritting something out.  I think it is just as important HOW we grind out a problem or a task as the fact that we grind it out.  We have to give permission to ourselves and others to be FABULOUS with all our failures and our successes.  I think it is important for risk taking that you should sharpen your grit qualities but also make sure you do so with grace.

I think Grit is important but I also think that Grace, forgiveness of oneself in failure and success, is also important.  Don’t misunderstand me failing spectacularly is fine with me but we need to get back up and still be able to say

Whatever.  I’m Still Fabulous.

What do you think?  Is Grace as important as Grit in students?

Don

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2 thoughts on ““Promise me you’ll always remember: You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” ― A.A. Milne

  1. Wow! This is something that I never really thought about before. I think it is … assuming that we remember that failing, making mistakes, and trying again, can still make us fabulous, but that feeling fabulous shouldn’t discourage us from considering ways to get better. If we feel “too fabulous,” do we stop looking at how we can improve? I think that your “fabulous feeling” definition is more about not thinking less of ourselves for the mistakes that we make, but I wonder if we think too highly of ourselves, if we forgo putting ourselves in these situations to make mistakes. What do you think?

    Aviva

    P.S. Thanks for the kind words about my blog! Blogging is certainly something that I love to do — no surprise there! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes. I agree. I also think that our failsafe is that we feel cruddy about failing. What I am trying to say is that maybe feeling really bad about your failure is not always the right thing to do. Sometimes you need to shake it off and say, fine Ill try again tomorrow. I am trying to get to the attitude of failure, that more often than not there is little acceptance of failure and it inhibits growth and understanding. I was to change peoples mindset not only about grit but about how to fail gracefully.

      Like

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